6 Questions to Ask When Dating

When you’re out on a first date, you might not want to dive into asking personal questions right away. But once you’ve committed to a second or third date with someone, you may be ready to delve into some deeper conversations. After all, if you and your date aren’t on the same page about certain key values and beliefs, you may want to go your separate ways to avoid wasting each other’s time. On the other hand, you might discover that your date shares your core values, your goals for the future, and some of your favorite hobbies. How can you kickstart these conversations? Here are a few questions you’ll want to ask your date.

1. How Is Your Relationship With Your Family?

Understanding someone’s relationship with their family can give you valuable insights into their life, attachment style, and how they approach dating. If your date has a complicated relationship with their family, they may not want to open up about this topic right off the bat. It’s okay to tread carefully when it comes to this subject. But your date may also be eager to talk about their positive relationships with their family members.

2. What Are Your Hobbies And Interests?

Chances are, you already know a couple of your date’s hobbies and interests. They might be excited to suggest an activity you would enjoy for a future date. You may have been introduced by mutual friends who knew you shared some hobbies. Or you might have connected on a dating app, where you both displayed your interests on your profiles. But this is a good chance to learn even more about your date.

3. What Are Your Religious And Political Beliefs?

What if you fall hard for someone, only to find out later that you both have strongly held opposing beliefs regarding politics and religion? You might end up dealing with conflicts that have no possibility for compromise. You don’t have to share every single one of your beliefs. But if there are any political or religious beliefs that would be dealbreakers for you in a relationship, it’s better to find out early.

4. Do You Want Kids One Day?

You don’t need to jump right in and ask your date about their opinions on kids during your very first date. But even though this is a deeply personal question, it’s best to ask early on. What if one person definitely wants children, and the other does not? They are not going to be compatible in the long run. You can’t meet in the middle on this issue. Therefore, you’ll need to get an idea of your partner’s opinion as soon as it’s appropriate to ask.

5. What Are Your Goals For The Future?

Maybe you have a five-year plan in mind, and you’re wondering whether or not your date shares some of your dreams and goals. Even if your date doesn’t have their own specific five-year plan, it’s a good idea to see if you’re trying to head in the same direction. If it seems like your paths will always diverge, the relationship might not be a good fit.

6. What Are You Looking For In A Relationship?

Finally, ensure that your date is looking for the same type of relationship that you are. If you have your heart set on a serious, committed relationship, but they only want a short, casual fling, both of you are bound to end up disappointed.

Are you struggling to connect with potential partners on dates? Working with a therapist can help. Reach out to us to discuss your options for handling your first session for therapy for women.